I can't get excited for Beyond: two souls after Heavy Rain. What I noticed in 20 minutes of it just now.

David Cage spent ages not using the female character at all, and her first scene boils down to saying she has insomnia, showing her tits and ass, then a pointless nightmare sequence to excuse having her getting attacked by men in her underwear and pinned to a bed and having her throat slit. Seriously, that's the definition of gratitutous.

Half of madison's scenario's end up with some leering dangerous creeper man staring at her, or pinning her down suggestively.

There's a whole DLC that was cut from the original game that's exclusively about a taxidermist who kills and stuffs women's corpses and wants to kill then rape her, and there's literally no context to it at all.

All of David Cage's works are just really shitty to all of their female characters.

Nobody's apartment is anywhere near within their financial means

Ethan carries a loaded gun through a metal detector in the train station and nothing happens.

Money is no object to anyone

Who's the woman who agrees to record creepy messages telling people to drink poison or cut off their limbs? And why does it have to be a woman? Oh wait, David Cage hates women.

Why doesn't anyone report the maniac who drove 5 miles the wrong way on the highway in the rain?

That massive blockade and 3 police cars chasing you past it sure took their time checking out the upside down car a few yards from them.


Scott Shelby kills like 20+ guys at one point with a single handgun and never reloads it. And it has no visible extended mags before anyone says that. extended mags are big.

Scott Shelby's name reminds me of Jay Gatsby. That one isn't a problem.

If you just leave the kid in there for 5 days, and go off being super busy with other stuff, wouldn't they starve or die of thirst before they drowned? Plus how does he keep his head above the water and stay standing for 5 days non stop?

The Police Dep. and train station imply it takes place huge a huge place with tens of thousands of residents, but except for the train station, everywhere is small, falling apart and barely any buildings have more than 2 levels. Is it just a REALLY good train station to transfer from?

Everyone has tons of pixels in their face textures but they can't lipsync for shit.

Woman slitting her wrists? Better be in her pyjamas, because that's what David Cage says.

The origami killer has a load of money coming out of nowhere. But he spends plenty of money building and maintaining an office, buying phones, GPS', paying garages to maintain cars years(which no garage would bother to do indefinitely for someone who never checks in), buying materials for all of the trials, writes custom software for these phones he keeps buying, buys another pistol for every child he takes, installs hidden rooms and obtains delayed poisons. YET HE HAS NO JOB, NO INCOME, COMES FROM A SHITTY FAMILY WITH NO MONEY AND SPENDS MONEY ON PRETENDING THAT HE ACTUALLY HAS A JOB. AND HE'S BEEN BURNING THIS MONEY FOR 2 YEARS.

The police make no attempt to check in with the families who lost their kids to find clues to save the next ones?

Ethan's blackouts are the stupidest red herring ever. Not only can't he be the killer because he literally has to have the killer watch him cut off his finger at one point, proving it can't be him, but the killer spends ridiculous amounts of time and money setting up these trials, giving each father a gun, rigging GPS' .etc, and the origami killer killed 8 kids in two years in the fall, while he's been in a coma for 6 months. If he was the killer before the game, his wife might of said "Where are you going all the time, why do we have such huge bills and why are you buying so many cars and guns if you have no guns in the house?!"

He makes the same origami figures as the killer and walks to the exact street the killer will hide his kid on every time he blacks out. WHY?! Yes, apparently he has PTSD from his son dying, but this is a big stretch.

Wether or not you are a complete dick to Blake or his dream partner, he'll only be pissed or happy in that scene, and he'll never remember anything you did in a previous scene, no matter how unnecessarily agressive or life-endangering it is.

Every fight scene is badly done and the hit detection is awkward as shit.

Why is only one of the American characters played by an American?

They're right, he seems to of taken lots of photos of things and places with no understanding of how they work. Like crappy rundown garages in having 5 floors of underground car parks and cargo elevators.

Ethan Mars escapes a helicopter by jumping off of a third storey roof. It literally gets him no farther than just laying on his arse directly underneath the helicopter, why did they give up?

Why does Heavy Rain suck more than indigo prophecy/fahrenheit?

Why is David Cage so terrible at developing plot beyond emotional cheap shots like "oh a little kid is in danger" or "this woman in her underwear is being attacked by lecherous men" and characters having bipolar mood swings in dialogue/thought process and constantly shifting logic?

Views: 476

Comment by DrKilljoy on September 24, 2012 at 8:30pm

Two Words.....Ellen "I want her inside me" Page

meh. I liked Heavy Rain.

Comment by Rowan - AzureCantabile on September 24, 2012 at 9:06pm
So you want Ellen Page to be the-- okay I'm gonna ignore that bit. But Srsly, I was so incredibly underwhelmed by Heavy Rain, ellen page just seems to be the game industry tactic of throwing celebrities at movies they know are bad to make them at least sell. I love Ellen Page, but David Cage is such a shitty auteur that I cannot stand to give money to his cause. I'll watch a playthrough or something instead, the game's pretty much "fly the camera around and choose which order to do these 5 quicktimes events you must do all of anyway.".
Comment by Rowan - AzureCantabile on September 24, 2012 at 9:14pm
*gamme industry taking on the old film tactic
Comment by Abel2Disable on September 25, 2012 at 6:30am

I enjoyed Heavy Rain for what it was... A unique experience that moves gaming in a different and interesting direction. The Taxidermist DLC was so intense because she was so vulnerable in that situation. I genuinely felt scared for her. I actually like the idea of controlling a movie-like experience where my actions/decisions impact the story. I'm the breed of gamer who really appreciates a good narrative. David Cage excels at creating moving narratives that players can really invest themselves in emotionally.

Comment by Israel Pacheco on September 27, 2012 at 7:21am

This article makes me want to play through Heavy Rain again. I rented it back when it came out and thought it was extremely overrated. I enjoyed it somewhat but some of the plot holes like you said were ridiculous and I can't forget the beginning just running around and screaming JASON JASON hahahaha

Comment by Abel2Disable on September 27, 2012 at 9:36am

New IPs should be purchased, not rented. As consumers, we speak with our dollars. The types of games we buy will continue to be made. For instance, by buying GTA III in droves, we birthed a new genre. The industry realized that non-linear, open-world games is something we want. Which paved the way for Arkham City,  Red Dead Redemption, Sleeping Dogs, and other great titles.

Comment by Israel Pacheco on September 27, 2012 at 10:02am

@Abel2Disable I agree and disagree. I agree that we should support new IPs but only to some extent. I've supported several new IPs by purchasing them on launch or very close to launch such as Bayonetta, Batman Arkham Asylum, Dead Space, and Darksiders. All of which I was very excited for and have thoroughly enjoyed. But certain games like Heavy Rain, which I was on the fence about, I would rather rent. I'm not going to put down $60 bucks on a game I am not sure about. Another point is that certain games are not worth $60. I much rather pick them up when they drop in price. I can't afford to support every game that comes out just because I want them or just because they are a new IP. Also, GTA III was not a new IP. It was a change from the traditional isometric view of the first two games into a 3D sandbox game. The genre of 3D sandbox games was around before GTA III. It is just one of the first games to crossover into the mainstream and become a cultural phenomena.

Comment by Abel2Disable on September 27, 2012 at 11:42am

I used GTA III to illustrate the industry's rational tendency to give us more of what we want to buy. Here are some perfect IP examples: Heavenly Sword and Assassin's Creed. Gamers chose which would become a franchise with their purchasing decisions. Needless to say, I'll be showing support for Beyond: Two Souls on release day.

Comment by Rowan - AzureCantabile on September 27, 2012 at 3:49pm

Don't consider this an article. XD It's just a list of thoughts in no particular order that came to mind when i went back to the game for a few minutes recently.

Comment by Rowan - AzureCantabile on September 27, 2012 at 4:05pm

I have to agree though. While I feel a little bad not buying new IPs new, it's not about new ideas or reliable series, it's about how good a job they do of selling me on it. Infinite Space, for example I bought new, but I also plan on buying Resident Evil 6 and Assassin's Creed new. Beyond Two souls... I can't justify supporting, since I bought into Heavy Rain's marketing and was massively underwhelmed, I've a hard time being as excited for another game of it's ilk. 

I've also started to notice similarities that remind me of the things I simply dislike about David Cage. As a director, he puts me off of games he's involved with. Like M Night Shyamalan and movies. XD


You need to be a member of EpicBattleAxe to add comments!

Join EpicBattleAxe

The War Chest


The Axe Factor Poll!

What's YOUR take on successful Kickstarters failing to deliver?
Kinda confirms my worst suspicions/fears about crowd-funding.0%
It doesn't really discourage me, there's always the possibility a project won't work out0%
I think projects need to start formulating a plan for what happens if the project folds0%
I'm going to be much more selective about funding things in the future0%


  • Add Photos
  • View All

Community Blogs

EpicBattleCry - Are Alien: Isolation, Dragon Age: Origins, Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor & More too much of a good thing?

On today's EpicBattleCry we field a question from Aaron (@_Aaron_17) about the embarrassment of riches that will be October's gaming release calendar. Are there TOO MANY good games coming out in one time frame? We discuss exactly how much this ROCKtober will Rock on today's edition of gaming's most brutal video podcast!

Got a question for the EpicBattleCry crew?…

EpicBattleCry - Are Next-Gen Consoles Boring Without VR?

@ADLangfield is bored and needs an infusion of immersion to liven up his next-gen experience. Will VR be the shot in the arm he needs and will he get his dose before succumbing to same-as-last-gen-itus? We break it down on today's edition of gaming's most brutal podcast!

Got a question for the EpicBattleCry crew? Hit us up on Twitter via @EpicBattleAxe and tune in Monday-Friday to find out if your Q gets an A on EBC!…

will the crowdfunding bubble burst

I am still a big user of crowdfunding sites i have donated to a fair few games so far. From skull girls and grim dawn up to the more recent beasts fury. 

I think crowd funding has its place and thankfully i have not been burned as of yet but recently came across a kickstarter …

Who gets gaming shame....?

Gaming Shame :  

1) The shame a person feels when they just screwed up and their team has died and lost the match because of it.

2) The shame a person feels when they play a video game, but feel that they should be doing something that would be more productive.


I dont know about you guys, but I run into this more often than not, and its why I dont game as much as I used to.

Back in in the summers in between…

EpicBattleCry - Early Access Games Are Coming To Consoles

Early Access games are coming to consoles and you're going to pay for them. How do we know this? Because Daniel Kayser can see the damn future. You might be skeptical, but that's only because you haven't tried our ectoplasm brownies. @Lavi1z swallows the magic pills and we make the case on today's episode of Gaming's Most Brutal podcast!

Got a question for the EpicBattleCry crew? Hit us up on Twitter via @EpicBattleAxe and tune in Monday-Friday to…


Birthdays Today

Birthdays Tomorrow


XCOM Ironman - EBA Soldiers VS The Alien Menace

Started by Ian - Alexander Arts in Shameless Self-Promotion. Last reply by Scott Quertinmont 21 hours ago. 17 Replies

My girlfriend Jenny and I are working on a new survival series. We had a lot of fun with Minecraft Hardcore, and now we are going to try XCOM.The XCOM Ironman playlist is here:…Continue

Tags: youtube, XCOM

Divinity Original Sin, best game I have played in 5+ years

Started by Eric in Game Discussions. Last reply by Berserkaren yesterday. 1 Reply

This game reignited my love for video games. That usually happens once every few years with me and this game has done it. I have sunk over 80 hours into this beast already (to be fair I have two…Continue

Destiny Beta Codes, Who has extras and who wants em?

Started by Mord4k in Game Discussions. Last reply by Barachim yesterday. 9 Replies

So due to some really ridiculous circumstances, I've found myself with a few extra Destiny Beta codes on the following consoles: PS4, PS3, and once they're avaialbe Xbox 360. I have 1 for the PS4, 2…Continue

Tags: Destiny

Destiny and my concerns (after alpha)

Started by StarBound in Game Discussions. Last reply by Daracus on Saturday. 4 Replies

Destiny is one of my most wanted games for this year. I can't wait to get into the beta and have my fears quelled ...or justified if I am unlucky.Let's start off with Destiny is an MMO shooter if you…Continue

© 2014   Created by Lorin Baumgarten.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service